Complicated

Complicated

I don’t know how long I’m gonna last

And I don’t know even how far it would be

These days, there are things that I’m thinking of

Trying to weigh which is which

But what we’re talking about here is..

Who is he and where to go?

Letting go of the two..

Oh! I’ve thought of it a thousand times.

For equality and peace of mind.

Everytime I see the face of the man I love,

Those thoughts of letting go, vanish in my mind.

Geez, I want to stop cutting my hair to lighten up,

Quit pretending, stop the mess

Stop crying for milk to survive,

Do I love myself less?

I guess love is not there for me.

Looking at the mirror, shame, guilt and fear is my reflection.

I can’t find a place to stand,

Where am I? Where can I hide?

I can’t ignore nor deny..

Forgive me, I have hurt your hearts.

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When facing storms in life by Dr. Charles Stanley for Complicated

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Why Life Is So Complicated For You

So, if you are feeling that your life is complicated, here are 5 reasons why this is happening to you. The good news is that if you address these 5 obstacles, you will have a much better chance of living an uncomplicated life.

1. Focusing on the Complexity of Life

If you were to ask Confucius if life is complicated, his reply would be, “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”

The most difficult and anxiety-creating activity I found during Level 4 lockdown was doing the weekly shop. Adjusting to a new way of shopping where you had to stand in long queues to get into the grocery store while still maintaining a 2-meter gap outside and inside the store was exhausting.

One person per household was allowed to go to the grocery store, and that task was allocated to me. I began to dread the weekly trip, and I had to work really hard to manage my anxiety. I soon realized that if I continued to believe that this shopping exercise was complicated and challenging, then guess what? It would be.

It’s easy to see something as complicated when it forces us to shift our lives in some major way, but it’s often useful to first work on seeing this change in a more positive or simpler light. What will this change teach you? Can you incorporate it into your routine without too much upheaval? Do your best to make it as straightforward as possible.

THE COMPLEXITY BIAS

The complexity bias is a reason why we humans lean towards complicating our lives rather than keeping things simple. When we are faced with too much information or we are in a state of confusion about something, we will naturally focus on the complexity of the issue rather than look for a simple solution. In a recent article, the author explains, when “we succumb to complexity bias, we are focusing too hard on the tricky 10% and ignoring the easy 90%.”

When you are dealing with a situation that you feel is complicated and overwhelming, try to focus on coming up with solutions or strategies that are simple. Ask yourself this question: If I take the simple, straightforward approach what will be the outcome? More confusion or perhaps a solution? I think you know what the answer would be!

2. Being Constantly Worrying

As humans, we are emotional beings. When we are stressed, angry, frustrated, or unhappy, our thoughts and emotions can have a significant influence on how we react and behave.

Constantly worrying about your problems and what lies ahead in the future can drain your energy and cause physical and emotional distress in your life. The more you worry, the more complicated your life seems.

Looking for a silver lining or the best option in a bad situation does not come naturally to us. It takes work and continuous effort to navigate our way around the challenges and curveballs that life throws at you.

Fortunately, there are many strategies that can help you calm your worried mind and ease anxiety. Try the following to see what works for you[2]:

  • Breathing exercises
  • Meditation
  • Cardio exercises
  • Journaling
  • Yoga
  • Listening to music
  • Talking to friends

3. Trying to Control Everything in Life

We live in a complex world, and it can be very hard to find the answers to the challenges we face in our lives. We are all afraid of something, whether it is fear of failing, dying, or losing a loved one. Striving to have control over one’s life is an attempt to bury your fears so that you don’t have to face them.

If you are making decisions about your life from a place of control, then you need to stop. Striving to have control in your life is a sign that you are living your life in fear. You need to break free of your fears and learn to accept that there are things in life that are outside of your control.

Once you accept that life is all about your navigating your way through it rather than controlling it, you will find that your outlook on life will be more positive and not so complicated.

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react.” -Charles R. Swindoll.

4. Basing Your Happiness on Others’ Happiness

Your life will always be complicated and difficult if you hinge your happiness on other people in your life. Your happiness does not come from others, it comes from within you.

If you rely on another person’s happiness to live life, over time the complications of life will overwhelm you and you will lose your sense of self. You will find that you will be constantly trying to please others and trying to keep them happy — this is exhausting and detrimental to your wellbeing.

You need to take a breath, look inward, and then make a choice. Do you want to live a life valuing and believing in yourself the way you deserve, or do you want to live your life based on the happiness of others? I know what I would choose.

5. Feeding Into the Drama of Life

By feeding into other peoples’ drama, you are making your life more complicated than it needs to be. Drama and having toxic people in your life is a recipe for living an emotionally exhausting and complicated life.

There are certain types of people who live their life through drama and catastrophe. They choose to respond to life’s challenges in a way that is not productive. Stay away from them. If they do come to you with their drama, take a breathe and give yourself some time to work out how best to manage the situation without falling into the trap of taking on board their negative energy.

It won’t happen overnight, but the more you work on your self-acceptance and self-belief, the more courageous and confident you will be. With this courage, you will be able to step up and eliminate negative drama from your life. Once you have done this, your life will be less complicated and so much easier for you to navigate your way through life’s challenges.

Read more: https://www.lifehack.org/877501/why-is-life-so-complicated

3 Comments

  1. Can I simply just say what a relief to uncover somebody that really knows what they are discussing on the internet. You definitely realize how to bring a problem to light and make it important. A lot more people should check this out and understand this side of the story. I cant believe you arent more popular because you definitely have the gift.

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